William H. Cooke

Noted Annapolis lawyer and historian. Defender of the innocent, righter of wrongs.

Early Life

Raised by wolves. Although the precise circumstances of Mr. Cooke's birth are not known, it is inferred that much of his earliest infancy was spent deep in the forests of Appalachia. His re-emergence into humanity took place in the opening weeks of the Reagan presidency, where on the wrong side of the railroad tracks beyond the city of Baltimore a poor coloured lady, on hearing a great disturbance in the chicken coop at night, shot-gun in hand found several hens missing (the wolves having fled) and a yowling snapping creature with matted hair caught in the corner. Taking him for a little negro boy (in his very dirty state) she subdued the child and brought him into the house. Much to her astonishment, on washing him (a necessary step) she discovered he was in fact a little white boy, or as close towhite as can be commonly found in those parts. Subsequently showing her employer, Mrs. Cooke, a respectable widow lady of Baltimore, it was thought best that she adopt him and bring him up as a gentlemen. The early kindness show to him by his humble rescuer gave Mr. Cooke a lifelong love and respect for the negro people of America, in whose defence he has worked tirelessly as an attorney.

Many amusing anecdotes exist about Mr. Cooke's childhood in Baltimore, no doubt influenced by his time in the wilderness. On one occasion while playing in the beck near the family home, he caught and killed a rattlesnake and had already eaten some significant part of the tail by the time his adoptive mother wrested it from him. On another occasion, having taken a series of street-cars across town he was found in the wild bluffs that overlook the city, wearing the skins of wild animals and preparing a possum by a small fire. And who, knowing him in his earlier years, can forget his dog Hooper, whom he found wandering behind the greyhound stadium one night and whom for many years was his loyal companion among the shady glens around his home and places of refreshment.

Education

Having a natural aptitude for lettering he was enrolled in day school while still young and, impressing the school prelate with his casuistry and understanding of the lives of the saints he was enrolled in Loyola Collage of the Jesuit order in Maryland; and having drunk deeply from the Jesuitical well graduated as Bachelor of Arts. Subsequently enrolling at the University of Baltimore's School of Law was granted Doctor of Jurisprudence, cum laude.

Career

As befits a journeyman lawyer seeking the widest possible experience over crude monetary gain, on being called to the Maryland Bar he begin his career at the office of the State's Attorney for Baltimore. Finding himself by temperament and character better suited to the role of defence, the wide range of experience of the State Attorney's office being gained, after five years he took up his present craft as defence attorney, subsequently establishing in Annapolis his independent office, The Law Office of William Cooke

Famous Cases

• Terrence Robert Proctor, not guilty of murder.
• Wade Joshua Braithwaite, not guilty of attempted murder.

Works

• The Gun-Wielding Philanthropist
• Witch Trials, Legends, and Lore of Maryland
• Great, Terrible, and Hilarious Ways to Make Money
• Justice at Salem, about the Salem witchcraft trials of 1692.
• North Pole Lost and Other Holiday Stories